We haven’t even gotten done going over the things wrong with the House health care bill, and now the Senate bill has been released. Another two thousand pages. More will be revealed this morning, no doubt.

In the meantime, let’s hope it’s a better read than the House bill:

The House bill is 2,000 pages. And it’s not exactly Michener, is it? It would have been a lot faster-paced if they’d left out the subplot about the lieutenant and the governor’s daughter.

Only one Republican would vote for a health care bill that doesn’t involve blowing things up. Now, will someone please tell them that swine flu comes from the Bay of Pigs?

Republicans in and out of Congress oppose the public option. They think it means putting a stop to insider trading.

The House passed some dumb amendment limiting funding for abortions, then misspelled it as the “Stupak Amendment.” Well, now who looks “Stupak”?

There is page after page of gifts to the insurance industry and individual congressmen itemized in the bill, but nowhere for the taxpayer to add a gratuity.

Most of the bill’s provisions aren’t supposed to kick in until 2013, a year after the Mayans said the world will end — a little concession to the Chamber of Commerce.

Former Ohio Secretary of State Ken Blackwell complains that the bill isn’t printed on 80 lb. paper.

Rep. Michele Bachmann opposes the Democratic bill. She wants to invite Uri Geller to bend the cost curve.

And some of the pages stick together.