Jul
07
Well Hello There
ByBefore I go all Medieval on yall I would like to take this opportunity to formally introduce myself. Hi, I’m Shad. It’s pronounced as it is spelled. I am new here (well at least here ). In the coming weeks, months, and years I will be bringing you a variety of informative blog posts about a wide variety of topics. But for now let me take this opportunity to get share with you a few things that really annoy me about Asheville:
- People who think there is a giant crystal formation underneath the city sending out “positive vibes” or whatever. Seriously, that’s just dumb.
- All the beards. We get it your an authentic mountain guy, but do you all have to look the same? Also, try trimming it up once and awhile.
- Those bugged eyed sunglasses that you ladies are wearing.
- The vast discrepancy between the cost of living and wages.
- The masturbatory love affair that Asheville has with itself. Don’t get me wrong this is a great city, but it’s no San Francisco. Please don’t ask me to vote in anymore online polls touting why Asheville or some local business or cause is the greatest.
- The fact that I can’t open my car door in this town without hitting a cyclist. And while we are on the topic, what is up with yall wearing the fancy spandex biking shirts?
That’s all I got for now. I look forward to working with you, here’s some music:
22 Comments
July 7th, 2010 at 9:42 pm
As to the last, it seems that i can’t ride around without hitting a car door, way too many of them around! The shirts keep you cooler and– we hope– make us more visible to you car types who think you own the road.
July 7th, 2010 at 10:35 pm
Oh jeebus, here we go. Childish prattle. What are you guys thinking?
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July 7th, 2010 at 11:40 pm
Nice, Shad. Controversy right outta the box.
Are you gonna be the Eddie Haskell to this blogs Beaver?
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July 8th, 2010 at 12:47 am
I’m looking forward to your posts. Ride’em cowboy!
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July 8th, 2010 at 1:22 am
fly away troll :3
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July 8th, 2010 at 3:01 am
Welcome Shad!
I just want to add that vortices are real phenomena. If Asheville has one, that’s totally cool!
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July 8th, 2010 at 7:33 am
Off topic, but good news.
“”Barring a gubernatorial veto, video sweepstakes in North Carolina is over. The North Carolina House of Representatives passed a ban on gaming Wednesday by a vote of 86-27. The Senate approved the bill in June.
Opponents of the games claimed they disproportionately affected the poor and having them in businesses increased risk for property crimes such as armed robbery.
Those who supported the gaming industry touted it as a revenue generator”"
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July 8th, 2010 at 8:34 am
I don’t think that Scrutiny Hooligans has a beaver.
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July 8th, 2010 at 9:29 am
* Ppl wh thnk thr s gnt crystl frmtn ndrnth th cty sndng t “pstv vbs” r whtvr. Srsly, tht’s jst dmb.
Lt’s mn ll th crystl, trn t nt br mgs, nd mk frtn sllng thm t ll th lcl mcrbrwrs! Shd, blv y hv jst crtd mch-ndd lcl mnng ndstry.
* ll th brds. W gt t yr n thntc mntn gy, bt d y ll hv t lk th sm? ls, try trmmng t p nc nd whl.
Rl mntn mn shv. knw ths fr fct. f y s smn wth brd wh clms t b mntn mn, sk hm why h hs nt shvd. f t s wmn, ffr t b hr gnt nd prms mtn pctr rl. Mst brdd lds wh clm t b mntn mn wll b flttrd nd plsnt thngs wll ns.
* Ths bggd yd snglsss tht y lds r wrng.
ndfnsbl lck f fshn sns. S lng s y d nt drctly lk nt th sn, y d nt nd snglsss. f y lk drctly nt th sn ths prbbly xplns yr lck f fshn sns.
* Th vst dscrpncy btwn th cst f lvng nd wgs.
t hs lwys bn my cntntn tht n n shld b chrgd fr lvng. r t lst, w cld jst b blld nstd f hvng t py p frnt. f w r sffcntly gd lkng nd shv vry dy, w shld b ffrd dscnt.
* Th mstrbtry lv ffr tht shvll hs wth tslf. Dn’t gt m wrng ths s grt cty, bt t’s n Sn Frncsc. Pls dn’t sk m t vt n nymr nln plls ttng why shvll r sm lcl bsnss r cs s th grtst.
Ys, shvll sd t b grt thn lt f ppl mvd n. Th mr ppl y hv, th lss nt plc bcms. Th vry bst plcs f ll hv n ppl whtsvr. f crs w d nt knw whr ths r bcs thr s n n t tll s nd t ds nt gt n th bst-plcs-t-lv gds.
* Th fct tht cn’t pn my cr dr n ths twn wtht httng cyclst. nd whl w r n th tpc, wht s p wth yll wrng th fncy spndx bkng shrts?
Mst cyclsts, t lst th ns wh pss my hs, r nfrndly. wv t thm (n ld mntn trdtn clld “thrwng p yr hnd”). Mst jst rrgntly gnr m. n rr ccsn, n wll ctlly rls th hndlbrs n r stp mntn rd lng ngh t wv. T tht prsn, rs bth hnds lk rfr ndctng tchdwn. S fr n cyclst hs rpld. drm f th dy, hwvr.
July 8th, 2010 at 9:49 am
Is this April Fools Day?
Scrutiny Hooligans was once a place for thoughtful well-reasoned ideas and dialog.
If S.Hooligans turns into just another website for trolls expressing personal gripes and criticisms….then I’m outta here.
July 8th, 2010 at 10:41 am
Dn, r y cllng Shd trll? thnk nt. gnm myb bt crtnly nt smthng s chrlsh s trll.
n shld b crfl n ths mttrs. Cllng thrs trll s hrd hbbt t brk.
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July 8th, 2010 at 11:57 am
I don’t think that Scrutiny Hooligans has a beaver.
Yep…that’s obvious.
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July 8th, 2010 at 12:07 pm
Don,
I really don’t have any personal gripes, just a few observations. If you are somehow turned off by the manner in which I expressed them (I was thinking of it as a light-hearted poke) then I well I guess there’s nothing I can do about that.
Also, I am all for dialog. However referring to someone as a “troll” probably isn’t going to encourage such a thing, but perhaps I lack the prerequisite “seriousness” (that ever elusive NOUN) that you require before engaging in said dialog…but I may prove you wrong just yet.
Ralph,
Thanks. You get it my friend.
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July 8th, 2010 at 1:10 pm
I think most of us got the humor in Shad’s opening post. Maybe *think* isn’t right. I *hope* most of us got the humor in Shad’s post.
I look forward to the new.
++++++++++
@RR
Nice stuff, Ralph. You’re on fire today!
++++++++++
@ DEM
Any excuse to type the word ‘beaver’ is my motto. But, I do look forward to Shad possibly knocking a little of the squeaky-clean off of the day-to-day postings.
Funny, insightful, provocative posts are needed here. I say the more views and styles the better.
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July 8th, 2010 at 4:11 pm
Shad, “seriousness” is a noun, elusive or not. Serious is an adjective.
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July 8th, 2010 at 4:18 pm
Shad is NOT a troll! He might be Billy Goat Gruff when he deals with trolls but he most definitely is not a troll himself.
It’s too hot. We’re in a drought. The country is going to hell in a hand-basket. Serious stuff will continue to appear on SH, even serious stuff from Shad. In the meantime, if he can sometimes lighten someone’s mood that’s just fine. We need an occasional smile.
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July 8th, 2010 at 5:12 pm
Wit,
Thank you for pointing out my error. I have corrected it. I have also taken the time to correct your obvious misspelling of my name. It’s good to be the King.
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July 8th, 2010 at 9:34 pm
i think ralph pretty much summed up most of my responses to your queries, and in such a lovely way.
since we are speaking in generalizations, i must admit that i agree to most of these observations. the one which hits me on a daily basis is the bikers. i understand that some bikers are quite courteous. at the same time, not all motorists are paying attention to the bikers. the problem which i deal with almost every single day is the fact that most bikers can’t decide which mode of transportation they would like to be that day. if a biker is riding with the cars, that person needs to abide by the same rules. this does not mean that he or she can start weaving through traffic to get to the front of the line. it isn’t smart, it isn’t safe and if it isn’t fair on the playground or at the movies, why should it be fair to cut in line on the road?
my tantrum is complete. you may now all go about your business as if i had never typed these words….please enjoy the music while the line is disconnected.
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July 8th, 2010 at 9:35 pm
Ralph, if those bicyclists who don’t wave are going UP the steep mountain road, they’re prolly fixin’ to puke. If they’re going DOWN, they’re prolly trying not to crash at 47 mph. Waving at folks on porches is more for flat stretches of road.
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July 10th, 2010 at 11:34 pm
Go shad go, congrats!
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July 11th, 2010 at 1:05 pm
Yo! Randallt! It has been a long time since your last post. I’m happy to see your post and hope your absence has been due to good things happening in your life.
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July 11th, 2010 at 2:13 pm
Poor Shad….sorry to disrupt the curmudgeon in you…we’ve just received yet another accolade:
Christ when will it ever end!!!!!
http://www.miamiherald.com/2010/07/11/1719103/for-art-architecture-beer-food.html
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