The Mump Vs. The Lump?
By
Dr. Carl Mumpower, Asheville City Councilman and Army of One, declared himself a candidate for the Republican nomination for NC’s 11th Congressional District. He’s alone in the race right now, but it’s likely that he’ll have a corrupt, lumpy opponent in disgraced former Congressman Charles H. Taylor.
AC-T: “In a news release, Mumpower said he is committed to what he defines as “essential issues†as the foundation of his “principles over politics†approach to public service.
Some of those issues include, “securing our borders, resisting a ballooning national debt, challenging Washington’s indulgence of special interests, reducing bureaucratic strangulation of our education, business and health care systems, redirecting our energies in the fight against the harms of hard drugs and focusing on enforcement of existing laws over the creation of new ones,” the news release states.
Mumpower said his mission is “to establish an independent and authentic conservative voice as our representative in Washington.”
“I want the people of WNC to know my name, that I am running for Congress, and where I stand on the issues,” Mumpower said in the news release. “They will take it from there.”
Carl Mumpower has made a name for himself by declaring a War on Hippies, stealing a crack rock from a dealer in the Asheville ghetto, urging citizens to take photographs of homeless people in order to have them properly harassed, decrying all things immigrant, and popularizing a form of psychological warfare known as “low-talking”.
Like his supporters on the AC-T comment threads, Dr. Mumpower calls progressives socialists. He speaks of “Open Air Drug Markets” being one of the greatest threats to our society. Mumpower has stood on a pedestal of legal immigration advocacy, despite the fact that city neighborhood forums listed the issue among the least of Asheville residents’ concerns.
Should Chainsaw Charlie choose to enter the race, he’ll be facing an opponent with whom he agrees on most everything. The stark difference will be that Charles Taylor is a corrupt, greedy, lying disgrace, while Dr. Mumpower is simply a principled ultra-conservative out-of-step with all but a select group of rabid Republicans in the district.
I’ll take the principled, honest fringe candidate over the unprincipled multimillionaire con artist any day of the week. Welcome to the race Dr. Mumpower. We’re happy to talk about issues, but you can expect a healthy dose of Hooliganism as well.
UPDATE: audio of Mumpower’s announcment. Feel the Mumentum!
You can congratulate Carl by emailing him: drmumpower@aol.com
15 Comments
September 12th, 2007 at 11:52 am
This comment was first posted at an accidental double posting on this subject
Drama Queen:
“What kind of money do they have? I mean, isn’t this a slam-dunk?
Maybe I should send Mumpower all my Abramoff notes on what the press didn’t cover about the favors Taylor did for convicted Interior Creep Steven Griles. I live about two miles from the archives building, Chuck. That means I can get the minutes of the meeting where he asked to to vacate a judicial verdict by legislation. And the Congressional Record still has online the three different ways you tried to do just that.
All I need now is to find out by what method did they transfer to you the payoff . . .”
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September 12th, 2007 at 11:57 am
admin, I went to edit a double-word in my comment and when it posted, it seems to have deleted Gordon’s comment and posted mine over his (while dropping my links) I’m pretty sure I was editing my comment (and not Gordon’s) because I remember changing the wrong word . . .
Sorry, Gordon!
Here is the link to the Taylor-related Interior Department debacle.”
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September 12th, 2007 at 1:48 pm
He, like most GOP’ers, is also an expert on marriage, having endured 3 of them.
Hence, his book: “A Guy’s Guide to Marriage,” available all over the Web. Here are some reader reviews from http://www.betterworld.com“:
“What a BORING and POORLY written waste of paper”
I’m sorry, I don’t like to be so critical, but is this author qualified to be giving advice? For people who are seeking helpful information, find another source and save some money.
“A good idea, but a mediocre book.”
Mumpower’s manifesto on marriage falls short of offering much in the way of creative or innovative advice to a man seeking informal but professional council for questions about marriage. Mumpower seems certain to come across as some sort of wise voice on the subject, but ends up coming across as a generic author looking to score with a gereric book on what could of been a non-generic presentation of subject matter. I do not recommend the this book.
But would they vote him into Congress…?
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September 12th, 2007 at 1:57 pm
Three marriages?
Those women couldn’t handle all that Mump. He’s an army of Mumpower and needs an army of women.
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September 12th, 2007 at 2:06 pm
Wow, I had no idea that The Mump was a published author!
Heh, he even wrote a book on divorce! I guess he figured that he was more of an expert on that subject than marriage… because seeking marriage advice from someone who’s been divorced three times seems, i don’t know… what’s the word I’m looking for…
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September 12th, 2007 at 3:24 pm
Actually he married the same woman twice. His current one…so only TWO divorces. But still, a respectable GOP record.
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September 12th, 2007 at 4:48 pm
I think the biggest question that’s come out of this development is… why exactly am I excited about Mumpower running for Congress?
I guess I’m more than anything I’m interested in how he’s going to play “west of the Balsams”. How will Mumpie go over in places like, oh… Granny Squirrel Gap? I didn’t get the impression that low talking would go over too well out that way. He’ll probably win Buncombe and Henderson, but everywhere else is up for grabs. If either Mumpie or Shuler (haven’t really thought of a nickname for our Congressman yet – we’re open for suggestions) can get the larger outlying counties and either Buncombe or Henderson, they’ve got a good shot of winning. Shuler’s got the name recognition in the hinterlands, but he also has their support and their votes. On the other hand, so does Taylor, but his name recognition might hurt him in some places. I doubt that many people down in Murphy are talking about The Mump over coffee in the morning.
But that could change overnight. We’ll see how it plays out.
Another thing – will Carl also try to keep his seat on the City Council while running for Congress? Is the Army of Mumpower equipped to fight on two simultaneous fronts?
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September 12th, 2007 at 4:55 pm
I emailed Dr. Mumpower.
Yes, he will keep his seat on Council while running for Congress.
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September 12th, 2007 at 9:26 pm
Low talking?
Yeah. But when you actually hear what he’s saying, there’s another word for what comes out of his mouth, and George Orwell invented it.
What’s that word?
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September 12th, 2007 at 9:31 pm
Newspeak?
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September 12th, 2007 at 10:04 pm
How about “The Lump vs. The Chump”?
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September 12th, 2007 at 10:06 pm
Oops, I mean “The Mump vs. The Chump”?
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September 12th, 2007 at 10:40 pm
Lump.
Mump.
In French, “mump de morceau”
In spanish they’re “el gatos in some sombreros”
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September 13th, 2007 at 12:52 am
We’re gonna need more masks….
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September 13th, 2007 at 3:31 pm
No, it’s worse than Newspeak.
Carl’s a doubleplusgood duckspeaker.
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